I’ve been texting you for an hour,
But nothing has been sent.
Just writing.
Just erasing.
Just crying.
I want to know that you’re okay,
But I need to refrain myself.
From asking.
From intruding.
From speaking.
I fucking miss you so much,
But I’m trying to be strong.
Be unwavering.
Be smart.
Be tough.
I want you back in my life so damn badly,
But we need to end this cycle.
For you.
For me.
For us.

20 thoughts on “Abstaining

  1. You know, I think it is incredible that we allow such control over our emotions and feelings by other people to effect us. All that matters is our own sanity to cipher and see those emotions. Love the raw emotion here though. As you can tell it moved me to some serious thoughts. Thank you for being you.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yeah.I agree. I know what I’m feeling and what I really really want to do… But I’m smarter than that. I need to not act impulsively all the time. Thank you πŸ™‚β€οΈ Your words matter to me.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. Oh man that fucking sucks. That sounds so hard. After all the difficulties I’ve been through in different ways over lifeβ€” it’s this kind of thing that caused the most raw pain.


    Liked by 2 people

  3. These questions are the ones that raise the question – Purpose of life? is this reality? or is it just an emotional game played inside your head?
    Have a beautiful day! πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 1 person

  4. The Self wants it….The Being knows it….desires / emotions vs the pure / deep knowledge.
    Your writing is so relatable….everyone must have gone through this at least once….that’s why you connect right away….Much love

    Liked by 1 person

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